The Lord of the Matrix
by April3
Summary: [A Matrix/LOTR crossover] Due to eating a green jellybean, Neo Anderson has unfortunately traded places with Frodo Baggins. And Middle Earth is never going to be the same. *part 10 is finally up. You may rejoice.*
1. It begins

Disclaimers: I don't own any of these characters. Not the ones from the Matrix, not the ones from LOTR. I only own the craziness that is this fic idea. :]

Author's Note: It all comes from thinking far too much about how Elrond looks just like Agent Smith. And from beginning to obsess over both fandoms.

***

"You have to see it for yourself. This is your last chance. After this there is no turning back. You take the blue pill, the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes... "

Neo stared at Morpheus hardly paying attention the endless stream of words coming out of the man's mouth. He was getting kinda hungry and beginning to wonder what was the point of all the babble.

He blinked at the man held out two pills. Blue and Red. Lousy choices really. He didn't like those two colors at all. His favorite color was...

And then he saw it, glittering on the carpet right next to Morpheus' chair. It looked almost like a green jellybean. Green jellybeans were his favorite. he smiled and bent down to pick it up.

"...Neo? What are you doing?"

He stuffed the jellybean into his mouth. "There was a piece of lint...on the..floor and it bothered me so I was just--"

"That's...great, Neo. But right now I need you to just pick either the red pill or blue pill?"

"Do you have any green or purple ones?"

"....the color isn't important. Let me explain it again. The blue pill is bad, the red pill is good. Now which pill do you want?"

"....the red pill?"

Morpheus smiled and handed it to him. 

Neo popped it into his mouth and washed it down with a glass of water before following Morpheus to the machine.

***

Morpheus tried to explain what the pill did as Neo sat down in the chair. It was kinda comfy and then he remembered he was supposed to be listening... "What does that mean?"

Morpheus twitched and one of the others grinned, "It means buckle your seat belt, Dorothy, 'cause Kansas is going bye-bye."

"Oh.....which one of you is the scarecrow?"

But his pathetic attempt at humor went unanswered as he felt his hand become metallic and shiny and the world around him shift. Then he saw strange writing appearing along the coat of silver beginning to cover his skin.

Muffled voices spoke around him: "What does that mean?" "...I don't know."

And then Neo was gone.

***

"He's not here," Tank replied over the cell phone. "He's not here OR in the Matrix. I can't figure out where the hell he is."

"What do you mean he's not there?" Morpheus bellowed into the phone. This was just not his day. First, he found the One and discovered he was a complete moron and now he had lost the Moron...er...the One.

"He chose the red pill right?" 

He turned around. "Yes, Trinity, he did...." Then he thought back to their conversation. "And...I think he ate a piece of lint off the carpet..."

"...a piece of lint?" Trinity stared as Morpheus began crawling along the floor examining the carpet.

"Yes, help me look for...what are all these green jellybeans doing here?"

"Green jellybeans?"

"Yes." Morpheus held up the bag.

"Is this someone's idea of a joke?"

"....Smith!"

"Smith?"

"This must be his work."

"....right."

"All we need to do is eat some of these green jellybeans and then we'll find Neo."

***

Trinity sighed. In the end, it was her, Switch and Cypher that were going to be sent. She didn't mind working with Switch but she really wished Apoc was going instead of Cypher. There was something about him that she didn't trust.

They had each eaten a green jellybean, all of them trying not to laugh in Morpheus' face. Clearly their illustrious leader was losing his grip. And then they had each eaten another red pill and all sat down as Tank stared the program.

She braced herself and stared at the writing that had begun to appear on the metal goop covering her skin.

"Elvish," she heard Switch mutter in awe and then they were gone.

***

tbc


	2. Neo meets the Muppets

Disclaimers, etc: see part 1

***

When Neo woke up in a strangely small bed, his first thought was the Matrix was rather girly. What was Morpheus thinking? It was so...bright and cheerful. And what was this mop of hair on the end of the bed?  
  
He pulled on it and discovered to his surprise that the wig was actually someone's hair. The little person--actually, the guy was more of a midget--sat up, blinked and let out a confused "Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!"  
  
Neo, alarmed and confused by the midget let out an "Ahhhhhhhh!" of his own. Which grew into a "AHHHHHHHHHH!" as the midget pounced on the bed and began beating him into a bloody pulp.  
  
When he managed to move away from the berserk dwarf, he tried a new strategy. "Whoa, little dude..."  
  
"Where's Mr. Frodo?" The burly midget exclaimed as he proceeded to jump up and down on Neo's back.  
  
"Mr. Who?"  
  
Just then the door flung open and the midget stopped attacking him.  
  
"Sam, what are you doing?"  
  
Neo looked up at his new savior and sighed. Great, two more midgets. He was beginning to feel like Snow White. Hopefully, these two weren't like Psycho who was babbling on and on about some guy named Frodo.  
  
The other midget who was stuffing his face with a variety of desserts moved over to Neo. "Who are you?"  
  
"I'm Thomas Anderson, but you can call me Neo....Have you seen Morpheus?"  
  
"No...and I don't think you've seen a hobbit by the name of Frodo Baggins, have you?"  
  
He liked this dwarf. He had a funny accent. "What's a hobbit?"  
  
"Well, me and Merry, we're hobbits. And so is the crazy one, his name's Sam."  
  
"I'm not crazy, Mr. Frodo's gone!!!"  
  
"Keep it together, Sam."  
  
Neo shook his head and set about ignoring Merry and Sam and focusing his attention on Pippin. "So hobbits are really short people--"  
  
"With furry feet, see?"  
  
Neo could plainly see that this was the case once the hobbit stuffed his fuzzy foot in his face.  
  
"....right."  
  
The other midget, the one named Merry looked over at them from where he was trying to calm down the one named Sam. "Maybe we should take him to see Elrond?"  
  
"Then we ought to finish off the food we stole from him first."  
  
"Yes, that's probably wise."  
  
Neo felt marginally better as Pippin handed him a crumpet.  
  
***  
  
By his third crumpet, Neo had reached the conclusion that he rather liked the muppets....er, the hobbits. Peregrin 'Call me Pippin' Took and Meridoc 'Call me Merry' Brandybuck were really fun. Though he did have to admit that Samwise 'Where's Mr. Frodo?' Gamgee was kind of a stuck in the mud.  
  
Still, you had to feel sorry for a midget with a sexual identity crisis.  
  
They went off looking for some Elf named Elrond after they gorged themselves. Neo was really starting to like the Matrix. It was kinda like a real awesome video game.   
  
They burst into to some room where a private meeting was going on. He liked that the muppets didn't seem to care about stuff like that. They seemed pretty care-free.  
  
The two men in the room didn't seem too cool though. Both looked like they were wearing dresses and neither one of the looked like they would know where Morpheus was. The old guy with the beard was the first to look at them.  
  
"Fool of a Took! This is a private meeting!"  
  
Pippin looked sheepishly at Merry who stammered a bit before getting the message across. "It's just that Frodo's missing and this weird bloke named Neo was sleeping in his bed. Neo's pretty nice though and..."  
  
Merry continued talking but Neo didn't pay it much attention as he already knew what had happened. Instead he looked over at the other man who has just turned around and--  
  
"Nooo!!! Run Muppets! It's Agent Smith!!!"  
  
"...."  
  
The others turned to look at him as he marched towards 'Agent Smith.'  
  
"You thought you could fool me by dressing up like a woman and wearing a wig? And those ears? Ha, you're not fooling anyone."  
  
'Agent Smith' stared at him like he was a complete and absolute nutcase....and so did everyone else.  
  
"I'll show you guys! He's really Agent Smith!"  
  
Neo rushed 'the Agent' and began trying to remove his fake ears and his wig. They didn't come off and 'the Agent' seemed to be getting rather pissed off.  
  
He looked up at the muppets who were all wincing in anticipation of something dreadful. The old man looked torn between laughing and yelling at him.  
  
'Agent Smith' growled rather fiercely and pulled away from Neo. "Now, I don't know what ails you, but I will have you know that I am wearing a robe not a dress and that these ears and my hair are permanently attached to my skull which is now in a good deal of pain because of you!!!!"  
  
Pippin giggled softly until Merry smacked him upside the head. Neo tried to keep a straight face.  
  
"....but...you look just like Agent Smith."  
  
"Just tell us where Mr. Frodo is!" Sam begged.  
  
The man who looked just like 'Agent Smith' if he had pointy ears and dressed in women's clothing sighed and sank into his chair. "So now we are not only missing the ring bearer but the ring as well?"  
  
"No, I have the ring for safe-keeping," Pippin piped up.  
  
"We're doomed."  
  
Neo wondered if everyone in the Matrix was this odd.  
  
***  
  
"What do you mean Mr. Anderson is completely gone?"   
  
Agent Jones and Brown looked a tad uncomfortable as Smith posed the question.  
  
Jones cleared his throat and loosened his tie. "I'm not sure, but we believe it is linked to this." He handed Smith a bag of green jellybeans.  
  
"....."  
  
"We're not sure what it all means, but these green jellybeans were all that we found."  
  
"Green jellybeans?"  
  
"It's only a hypothesis, but we think that he must have disappeared completely some time after eating some of these jellybeans."  
  
"Do you two have any idea how ridiculous that sounds?"  
  
Jones and Brown nodded.  
  
Smith drummed his hands on his desk and stared at the jellybeans. Was this Morpheus' idea of some sort of sick joke? He hated humans. He hated them because of things like this. Only as human being would think this was remotely funny. Well, he was not amused.  
  
"Then there's only one solution, we go in after them."  
  
Jones nodded though Brown seemed to have some slight reservations. Smith looked over at him. "Yes, Brown?"  
  
"Do we really have to eat green jellybeans? Couldn't we go get some grape or maybe coconut-flavored ones? The green ones taste like grass."  
  
"....Brown, I think that is the weirdest thing you have ever said."  
  
  
***  
  
tbc


	3. Of j'ellybeans and pills

Disclaimers: see part 1

Author's Note: Just so you know, it's just going to get weirder, sillier and more complicated. And…you might not want to read this if the thought of Switch or Arwen as possibly lesbians bothers, perplexes or scars you for life.

***

Switch opened her eyes to find herself in a very, very strange position. Mostly because she seemed to be kissing a woman. It took the woman a few seconds to remove her tongue from Switch's mouth. She looked a little perplexed.

Switch couldn't blame her. She was a little perplexed herself. She looked around...definitely too pretty to be the Matrix. She looked at the woman and noted her pointed ears. She tried not to look too pleased with the situation. If she was where she thought she was, this was going to be quite an enjoyable hunt for the One.

The Elf cocked her head questioningly. "...Who are you?

Elven. Switch remembered that day when she had reluctantly asked Tank to create a program to allow her to learn it. Switch never said much about it, but she had been quite a Tolkien fan growing up and had never quite overcome her love for those books. And here it was, all real and she was going be living for X amount of days.

She grinned. "My name is Switch. Take me to your leader," she replied in flawless Elven.

***

"So basically, I ate this red pill and this green jellybean and here I am."

 Neo looked up at his audience. Two of the muppets were asleep; Sam seemed to be eyeing him suspiciously. The old man and 'Elrond' looked like they were still trying to sort out what half of what he said meant.

The old man was the first to speak. "...Ah, very…very good…...Neo was it?"

"Yes sir."

"Well, I am Gandalf the Gray. I will do my best to try and figure out what magic has brought you here."

"Gandalf the Gray...is that French?"

"....I don't believe it is..."

Sam let out a groan of the utmost frustration. "But none of that helps us locate Mr. Frodo, Mr. Gandal--"

Neo, 'Elrond' and Gandalf all blinked as the aggitated hobbit disappeared and--

"Trinity!" Neo leapt out of his seat and gave her a hug. "Boy am I glad to see you. I think something was wrong with that jellybean you gave me."

Trinity blinked as Neo glomped her. Where the heck were they anyway? This couldn't be right...and where was Switch and Cypher?

"Ow, let go of me, you bastards!"

Oh. There Cypher was. Trinity placed a hand on her hips and smirked in amusement as Cypher was dragged in by an angry bearded man and a tall blonde boy with pointed ears. God, they looked just like characters out of one of Switch's books. 

"These are friends of yours?"

"Agent Smith!" Cypher yelled.

Trinity turned around guns blazing. "Where?"

"No! Stop!" Neo cried running in front of them and pretty much bowling 'Elrond' over. "He just looks like Agent Smith, but the ears are real! And he's wearing a dress."

"Thank you, Mr. Anderson," 'Elrond' said with a sigh.  He tried to collect what little dignity he had been left with and rose to his feet. He was beginning to pity this A'gent S'mith.

***

"So basically we ate a green jellybean and a red pill, and ended up here," Trinity said crossing her arms.

Elrond and Gandalf exchanged exasperated looks. The hobbits had woken up for the last half of the story and looked horribly confused. Neo was snoring away in between them.  The Dwarf was picking his nose and the Elf was waving his hand in the air.

"Yes, Legolas?" They had all exchanged names prior to the tale.

"Sorry to interrupt, but what is a j'ellybean and what is a pill?" 

"....Oh...." Trinity felt like a complete idiot. No wonder half of them were asleep. She glared over at Neo and snorted. "Sorry, maybe I should try to--"

"No, no," Elrond said quickly. He didn't seem eager to hear the story again and she couldn't blame him. "I would suggest instead that we--"

The door opened quietly and in walked a truly beautiful Elf woman followed by Switch.

Trinity ran over to her and gave her a hug. "Thank God, you're here."

The Elf woman went over to Elrond. "Aragorn is gone. This woman appeared in his place."

Elrond sighed. "So Mr. Baggins, Mr. Gamgee, Boromir and Aragorn are all missing? Vanished without a trace?"

Switch gave Trinity and Elrond both a reassuring smile. "Here, I'll explain."

Everyone sighed in unison, clearly accepting defeat. Everyone except Neo who continued to snore loudly until Switch began to explain the story.

***

At the end of her tale told half in English and half in some other made-up language only Switch, the Elves, and Gandalf seemed to know, everyone let out a loud "Ah, now that does make a bit more sense."

"And that's how we got here," Switch said with a smile.

"It's a good thing this lass turned up," The Dwarf muttered to no one in particular.

"Yes, a very enjoyable tale," Pippin said happily munching on the very last of Elrond's crumpets that they had stolen earlier.

Elrond glared at him and sighed. "Well, now at last we understand one another. A miracle."

Switch could understand why everyone kept confusing him with Agent Smith.

***

tbc


	4. Evil rings are shiny

Disclaimers: part 1

Author's Note: Just a quick thank you to everyone who has been reading and better than that reviewing. Neo thanks you, Elrond thanks you, Agent Smith hates you but I thank you anyway. ^^

***

Elrond, Gandalf and Switch spent the next few hours explaining the history of Middle Earth. 

Trinity looked over at Neo. Sure he looked like he was paying attention but she saw the way he kept staring out the window. Oh well, she was paying enough attention for both of them. 

Cypher looked bored and pretty pissed. And he was. He hadn't wanted to come in the first place. He didn't care about the history....though she saw his eyes glitter when the topic switched to the ring.

Of course, so did Neo's when Pippin finally found it in his pocket. Merry snatched it away from him and made a show of cleaning it. Elrond seemed to be trying to control his temper. Gandalf laughed but it didn't seem to be a chuckle of amusement.

Trinity smiled at the old...wizard, was it? She understood far too well what his situation was and now with those that these people trusted had vanished...well.... She looked at the ring, she had no need for it, but a part of her half-hoped that she'd have the chance to help these people save their world if it ended up she couldn't go back to save her own.

Switch seemed to be almost completely in her element, well, except for her clothing, of course. 

A decision had been made to stop for the evening and continue where they left off in the morning when the decision of what to do with the ring was made.

But another dilemma still presented itself: What would be done with the ring in the meantime? Gandalf and Elrond made it clear they wouldn't touch it. Trinity rolled her eyes when the two hobbits, Neo and Cypher all eagerly volunteered to keep it safe. Switch didn't voice an opinion, probably because any interest she had in the ring came from an obsession with this world and that in of itself was could be potentially dangerous.

Finally, with a long sigh and a stare from Elrond that cut even oblivious Neo to the quick, he was presented with the ring. 

"Dude, I'll be so very careful with this."

"Just...go rest for tomorrow, Neo," replied a very weary almost twitching Elrond.

Switch patted his shoulder and he sighed though he seemed slightly less tense. Trinity was willing to bet that if Elrond felt any of them worth the amount of time he had spent in their company, it would clearly be Switch.

She blinked, a bit surprised when she noticed that Arwen, Elrond's daughter was still there. She was even more surprised when she saw the way Arwen was looking at Switch. Right. Maybe it was time for bed after all.

***

Switch couldn't believe that she was really here. Here in Middle Earth. She remembered those books better than she did her childhood. She had always felt in someway responsible for the world after she read them and though she would never have admitted it, it was the biggest reason why she had decided to be unplugged. If Tolkien had meant for Middle Earth to represent the World the way it ought to be, she wanted to find a way to bring that world back.

And here it was, all because of a green jellybean. 

"Might I speak to you."

Switch smiled and turned around. She wasn't sure why Arwen wanted to speak to her, but she wasn't about to object to company especially when the company was an Elf...a hot Elf.

"Of course."

"Tomorrow, I'm fairly certain you will leave and help out on this quest. Aragorn...I know he would have gone but he is not here....And I would like you to have this."

Switch blinked and blushed slightly as the Elf handed her a necklace....this hadn't happened in the book, but oh well. "I don't know that you should give this to me. He may come back to you, there is still hope...but...."

"But?"

"But, is this really what you want with your life? To waste away over some guy?"

"...."

When it was clear that the Elf was going to offer no reply... "Well, it just seems to me," Switch said, falling back on English, "that you're throwing away everything you have for some guy who's not even half your age."

"I hadn't...given that much thought."

Switch didn't say that she doubted the Elf had thought about it at all. "Well, you really ought to. I mean, don't throw away your life on a whim. Before you make any decisions you obviously need to think it over, consider your options--"

She was cut off by the Elf kissing her. "Thank you."

She blinked as the Elf rushed away. Obviously it hadn't taken much to change Arwen's mind. She glanced down at the necklace before slipping it on. Maybe it would bring her luck.

***

The next morning, the Council was called as planned. Switch sat between Trinity and Neo pointing out who was who. Neo kept looking at her like she was from Planet Nerd until Trinity smacked him upside the head.

She seemed a little bit cranky, Neo reasoned.  The hobbits and dwarves had been hitting on her the night before.

He wasn't too crazy about the dorky outfits they were wearing either. He was chafing in all the wrong places. He didn't understand why 'Elrond' thought he was a moron and seemed to like Switch the best out of all of them.

Cypher was sitting next to Gimli. They had spent most of the night getting drunk together.

He fingered the stupid One Ring. It was really shiny. Neo guessed that must be why so many people wanted it. If only last night hadn't been so boring. Even Pippin had paid more attention than he had.

Oh well. He set the ring on the stump in the middle of the circle. You'd think that with all the money these people must have had to live in places like this that they'd at least dress nicer or make the council area...well, less than a bunch of stumps around a stump. It seemed pretty tacky to him. He was willing to bet it had been 'Elrond's' idea.

No one seemed particularly happy to be there either. They all glared at the ring and glared at each other. It was rather annoying.

Elrond began rambling on about uniting and taking care of some guy named Sauron and how he had a minion named Sarumon. Sounded like that kid show Pokemon to him. Oh well. 

Neo waved his hand wildly until 'Elrond' had no other choice but to acknowledge him. "Yes, Mr. Neo?"

Ugh...well, it was better than Mr. Anderson.

"Their names are so similar. How are we going to be able to tell them apart? Ow!"

He glared at Switch who had elbowed him in the ribs. Being the One, he would have thought he could have been entitled to more respect...

"The difference is that Sauron is a big evil red eye, Sarumon is a wizard who wears white and works for him. Do you even pay attention?"

"They still have silly names. That's really all I was saying," Neo whined ducking behind Trinity.

"Just let Elrond continue, Neo or we'll be here for a month!"

Trinity held her arms out between the two of them. "Both of you knock it off!"

Legolas and the other elves shook their heads while Gandalf smiled.

"As I was saying, we must take the ring to Mordor and --"

"Wait, you guys."

Switch shot Cypher a withering look.

"No, no, hear me out, Switch. You guys want to save this place from an evil red eye, so why no just use the ring? It makes more sense than throwing it in a volcano. That's just asking for trouble."

The other men sitting across from them all seemed to agree except for one who was busy glaring at Trinity, Switch, Neo and Cypher...well, mostly Neo and Cypher.  Everyone here was so unfriendly.

"See? They agree with me so why--Ow!"

Trinity smirked after she finished smacking Cypher upside the head. "They have to destroy it, you moron. It's evil, it's of no use to them. Try paying attention sometimes."

She nodded to Elrond who offered her a thin perplexed smile before continuing his speech. Neo decided to remain quiet. He didn't want to get punched again. 

Elrond continued to babble: "Ring this that blah blah Sauron blah blah blah blah blah listen blah blah blah this is important blah blah blah"

" Neo?" 

"Blah blah you must always remember blah blah blah" 

"Neo?" 

"Blah blah it is imperative that blah blah blah"  

"NEO!!"

He realized Trinity was screaming in his ear. "What? Where? He blinked. Whoa, everyone was fighting and ah! He watched as Gimli's axe broke into pieces on top of the ring. That was one cool ring, all right. Was that why everyone wanted it?

Trinity sighed miserably and muttered something to the effect of "He's an idiot." Neo nodded, Elrond was indeed an idiot.

"They're fighting over who's going to take the ring, Neo," Switch pointed out.

"That's cool..."

".....don't you think we should help?"

"Why do we always have to...okay, okay! Don't hit me..." Neo shook his head at Switch and got up. He stared at everyone fighting...all right, if it meant she wouldn't hit him and hey, it would make Trinity think he was pretty cool. "I'll take the ring."

".....Why? Why me?"

"Switch, why does Elrond keep making those funny noises?"

***

tbc


	5. Neo vs The Muppet King

Disclaimers: part 1

Author's Note: Poor, poor hobbits. It's a good thing they are too adoraboo and nice to kill me for all the stupid Neo I have unleashed upon them. 

***

Luckily for Elrond, Trinity, Cypher, Switch, Neo and Middle Earth, others agreed to go on the quest. Gimli volunteered, Legolas agreed once Gimli volunteered. Gandalf insisted upon going. 

Merry and Pippin were determined to go in case Frodo or Sam returned along the way.

Elrond nodded. "Nine of you shall go as the Fellowship of the Ring representing all of this Middle Earth and--"

"When will we go?"

"You shall go away--er, to Mordor as soon as possible, Mr. Anderson."

"Sweet."

Elrond raised an eyebrow. "…Indeed."

"Wait…I thought we were going to Mount Doom."

"Mount Doom is in Mordor, you knucklehead," Cypher muttered irritably.

Everyone stared at him.

"What? I pay attention too, you know?"

***

Elrond shook his head as Neo, Cypher and Gimli went off to get 'wasted.' He was beginning to loose all hope. He had very little faith in this new ring bearer.

"I know he's pretty clueless, he means well. We'll get the ring to Mount…Doom, was it?"

"Yeah, it's the cracks of Mount Doom, Trinity. Neo won't do anything to harm the ring. I think he's too oblivious to give into its power. So, it's safe so long as he's safe, Mr. Elrond."

He looked up, ah…Trinity and Switch. They had ridiculous names but at least they looked competent.

"Perhaps you are right."

"Trust me, I'm not anymore crazy about him than you are," Switch added, "but he's supposed to be the One to save my world too. He hasn't gotten any training yet though."

"Ah…that explains some of it."

"We'll get it there. I'll get it there."

Elrond smiled. He believed the two of them would despite the somewhat lacking intelligence of their cohorts.  "I'm sure you will."

They nodded and began to leave.

"And Switch."

Switch turned around.

"Thank you for talking some sense into my daughter."

Switch blinked, blushed slightly and then saluted. "Not at all, sir."

"What did he say?" Trinity asked as they left the room.

"I'll tell you when you're older, Trinity."

"Ha ha, very funny."

***

"Have you heard the cool little jingle they have for the Ring, Trinity?"

Trinity sighed and looked over at Neo. Why did they both have to be the only ones ready to go? She could already feel her IQ level reaching a new low. Oh well. He meant well, at least. After all, he had to have some sort of bravery, compassion, and smarts to volunteer for a mission of this magnitude.

"_One ring to rule them all, One ring to find them, One ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them in the Land of Mordor where Shadows lie._ Wouldn't that be an awesome rock song?"

Or maybe not.

"Neo, that's not really a--"

"Might I have a word with you, Neo, my boy?"

Ah, it was that older hobbit Pippin and Merry had been talking to earlier. She didn't offer any objections to Neo leaving. Maybe the old guy would talk some sense into him.

*** 

Neo eagerly followed the old Muppet away from Trinity. She obviously had been blown away by his incredible idea. Always leave them wanting more and all that.

"Now, Neo, I have heard much about you from Pippin and Merry. I was hoping to give this to my nephew, Frodo, but since he's disappeared and probably won't be back from some time, I would like you to have this. It is called Sting and it will glow bright blue when Orcs are nearby."

The old midget handed Neo a small dagger. He pulled it out of its sheath and stared at the inscriptions. "Whoa. This is so cool! Thanks, Elder Muppet!"

"Elder…Muppet?"

"How can I ever repay your most excellent generosity?" Neo said trying to speak like Elrond. They all seemed to talk like they were from really old movies and plays here in Middle Earth.

"…I think you already have, my boy. And I think I will save this chain mail for my nephew blah blah blah marvelous blah blah blah important blah blah all right?"

Neo looked up from the dagger. "Sure, Elder Muppet."

"Right. I leave you then to rejoin your comrades and begin your perilous, arduous, magnificent quest."

"Sure thing, Muppet King."

The old midget just stared at him obviously in awe of his amazing skill and strength.

"Yes, well…good luck then….good luck to us all."

***

tbc


	6. Frodo & Co

Disclaimers: part 1

Well, Neo and the others are heading out on their quest, but what about Frodo, Sam, Aragorn and Boromir? Where have they turned up? And what pray tell has become of everyone's favorite computer program, Agent Smith?

***

It took Frodo awhile to recover his senses. He woke up clutching at the healed wound on his chest and wondering where he was. He really hoped he wasn't in Mordor though it certainly seemed like he was. The place was dark, smelly and completely made of metal.

No one else was around, not even Sam. And to his horror, he discovered he didn't even have the Ring. He had never felt like such a failure. Gandalf would never forgive him for this....if there was still a Gandalf by the time he got out of here.

He angrily kicked at something and then clutched his foot in pain. Stupid metal. Stupid Sauron. Giant red eyes shouldn't have minions.

"Whoa! I'm awake Morpheus, really!" A loud voice piped up from behind him and then "Ahhhhhhhhh!"

Frodo stared at the boy who was looking at him in confused horror. "No, no, don't panic, it's all right! I'm a prisoner here too!"

"...You're a what? All right, very funny. Who let the little midget on the Neb, huh? Guys? Guys?"

***

Once the young man calmed down and they introduced each other, Mouse thought it would be wise if Frodo went to meet Morpheus, the leader of these people who lived on a ship called the Neb or the Neberkenezer. 

Frodo was a bit relieved that he wasn't in Mordor though he was beginning to get the sinking suspicion that he was still a long, long, long way from home. He wasn't very comforted when Mouse laughed at his name and asked if he was related to Bilbo Baggins. He seemed a bit shock when Frodo indignantly replied that he was which made the young man begin to chatter very excitedly about a friend named Switch and some dead fellow named Tolkien.

Mouse continued to babble above him and Frodo smiled. This boy would have gotten on very well with Pippin and Merry.  At least the people here seemed friendly enough though he did miss--

"Mr. Frodo! Oh thank goodness I've found you!"

Frodo 'oofed' as he was glomped by Sam, though he was pretty cheered at the sight of him.

"More midgets. This place is becoming a zoo," someone muttered.

"Yo, Morpheus, this hobbit named Frodo showed up in my room...where I was hard at work as usual.... Anyway, where's Switch? She has to see this."

Frodo looked up at the man who obviously was the leader or at least should have been, he seemed to be the most serious of the lot.

"A hobbit?" The man removed the strange glasses he had over his eyes and shook his head. "Well, he can just join the others that appeared and then I think we'll have to have a meeting. It seems there is a lot to discuss."

"A meeting?" Mouse groaned.

"What others?" Frodo asked anxiously.

***

Frodo was even more relieved when he was Aragorn and some other man who did not recognize. At least Sam and Aragorn were here. Aragorn would know what to do, but from the look of things, Aragorn seemed equally as overwhelmed as they were.

Morpheus did his best to slowly explain the situation. Mouse ended up doing the translating though. It seemed that though the boy was not actually that helpful to his comrades most of the time, he had paid attention to one of them about Middle Earth. He even knew Elven.

The talk was most unsettling. It seemed these people also had a Great and Mighty Overlord named MainFrame who was a green and black eye that saw all. He had many minions like the Nuzguls called A'gents. Their world was divided in two: The Matrix and the R'ealworld. And the one person who could unite these worlds and save them had disappeared after eating some mystical fruits called the green j'ellybean and red pill. Their powers combined had altered the fabric of the universe and transported them here.

Morpheus didn't seem altogether pleased by the way Mouse told the tale but he looked a bit too exasperated to make them sit through it once again.

"So through a sort of magic you can enter this Matrix and leave the R'ealworld behind?"

 "Way to be, Boromir. That's exactly right. Give me five."

Boromir stared at Mouse in confusion. Mouse in the meantime had raised his hand and was grinning. 

"Slap me some skin?"

"What?"

"Hit me."

Boromir looked to Aragorn who shrugged and nodded. Boromir slapped Mouse in the face.

Morpheus chuckled and Mouse sighed as he began to explain the magical art of giving someone Five.

***

"And who are these four unknowns, Jones?"

"Hey, that rhymes."

"Shut up, Brown."

"Well, sir," Jones said loosening his tie a bit more. "If my sources are correct, they seem to be fictional characters from a place called Middle Earth."

"Middle Earth? This isn't another one of your Star Trek stories is it?" Smith said with a look of contempt. Jones wasted a lot of valuable time downloading information on science fiction and fantasy novels. This sounded like one of them...though he was sure which one. He ran a search as Jones looked slightly unsure how to respond.

"Basically, these are characters from a series called The Lord of the Rings written by a man named J.R.R. Tolkien--" Brown interjected.

"I see," Smith said waving a hand dismissively. He had already found the information he needed, "and which ones are they?"

"Frodo Baggins, Samwise Gamgee, Aragorn and Boromir who--well, before we get to that though, Jones and I were wondering something."

"Wondering something? You're always wondering something!"

Both of the other agents cowered as he chucked a stapler at their heads.

Smith blinked and regained control of himself. He straightened his tie. Well, that had been an embarrassing little outburst. He scowled as the other two tried to sneak out of the office.  "Oh, for crying out--...Fine, fine, Brown, by all means, what were you wondering?"

They stopped and looked almost sheepishly at one another before looking back at Smith.

"We're not going to have to kill them, are we? I mean, I've never met a hobbit before and--"

"Brown, say another word and so help me I will send you to Middle Earth and you can live with the hobbits!" He was mildly annoyed when both the other agents looked almost delighted with the possibility.

***

tbc


	7. The One Ring Song

Author's Note: Back we go to the Fellowship of the Moron...err Ring.

***

Elrond and all of the Elves were there to see them off. They looked quite pleased that Neo was going, though Trinity wasn't sure most of their joy had to do with the ring. She smirked and grabbed his arm as he went in the wrong direction.

The hobbits seemed quite cheerful as well though she suspected it was probably because they didn't have much more of an inkling than Neo about what lay ahead. They also were still under the illusion that Trinity was interested in them.

Cypher was still trying to convince Switch to talk to him. She was pretty annoyed with him after everything he said about how they should keep the ring. Trinity herself was slightly suspicious. She had seen his little pow-wow with the Men from Gondor. All except the one who Legolas had said was Boromir's brother; Faramir had seemed delighted that he would be the one to go in Boromir's stead.

Gandalf hadn't said much yet, just led the way with Neo right behind him. Neo had wanted to go first, but Gandalf had reasoned with him. And by reason, Trinity meant bribe. Neo was now the Official Carrier of the Wizard's Pack.

Gandalf got to go first and do less work and Neo got to feel mighty. Though it was lucky he didn't see that even the hobbits were laughing behind his back.  

When they rested for the night, Gandalf asked to speak to Neo in private, so Trinity sat down at the fire next to Switch who sat down by the Dwarf and Elf. The Hobbits had gone to sleep. Evidently they were exhausted from only getting to eat twice a day. 

"So...how much further away is Mordor?"

Everyone else laughed and Trinity felt kind of stupid, but oh well.

"Quite a distance, Trinity," Legolas said with a smile. "Why? Are you tired already?"

"Hell, no."

"I just hope your friend is fully aware of the challenges that lie ahead."

"Oh, trust me, he isn't, but that's okay."

"So what do you guys do for fun around here?" Cypher asked suddenly. 

"Well, we could sing or perhaps we could indulge in spirits..."

"...Are you gay, Legolas?"

"Well, of course I am. We are doing quite well. I don't see why I should be otherwise."

Trinity and Switch glared at Cypher as he howled with laughter.

"Did I say something wrong?"

***

"Now, Neo, I thought it might be best if we talked alone."

Neo really hoped the old man was coming onto him.

"I just want you to know that what you are doing is very brave and that you must make sure you are up to the challenge. If the slightest problem goes wrong, the others and I will be there to help you, of course, but I want you to know that we're all counting on you."

The old man _was_ hitting on him. Oh gross. Neo nodded reluctantly.

"I...think I'll be fine, Mr. The Grey. It's just a ring after all."

"....Why don't you just call me Gandalf?"

Oh great. Now they were on a first name basis. 

"It will be a long, perilous journey, we all must become good friends and work together to see the saga through."

Neo nodded. This guy was starting to sound like Barney's cousin Garney the big Grey Dinosaur. All this 'I love you, you love me, let's take the ring to Mordor' nonsense. Oh well, hopefully the old guy would see that Neo wasn't interested in a relationship and they could go back and join the others.

He nodded and nodded as Gandalf continued to talk about the road ahead and where it led. Hey, that rhymed. That reminded Neo of the rock song he wanted to make of that One Ring poem.

"Neo?"

"Yes, Mr. The---err..Gandalf?"

"What are you humming?"

"Oh, it's this rock song I'm going to write about the One Ring."

"Rock song?"

***

After chucking a small rock at Cypher's head, Switch pulled the Elf aside and explained what gay meant. Legolas blinked and looked a bit irritated and embarrassed. 

"It's my hair, isn't it?"

"Your hair?"

"Well, it must be, look at it."

"....Your hair is very nice, Legolas, but I assure that it's merely because---"

And then like a dying animal screaming into the night, she heard someone singing loudly, obnoxiously and...horribly out of tune.

"_ONE RING TO RULE THEM ALL, ONE RING TO BIND THeeeeeeeeeeeeEM!!_"

Legolas covered his ears. "What in Middle Earth is that wretched sound?"

Switch sighed. She could only assume the worst. Neo was singing a rock song of the One Ring poem to Gandalf. And he wasn't even singing it right... "I think...it's got to be Neo."

"That boy is going to wake the very dead with his wretched cries," Gimli said crossly rising to his feet. "Where's my axe?"

"_ONE RING TO SOMETHING ELSE, EVIL EVIL SAURON EVIL EVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILL!!!!_"

"Gimli!"

"He is obviously being attacked by a wild beast of some sort," Legolas said, hands still covering his ears.

"No, unfortunately, I think Switch is right."

"_NOTHING WILL SAVE US FROM THE BINDING RIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiNG_!"

"Ah! We're under attack!"

Switch sighed as the hobbits began running about like they were under siege.

***

"Well? What do you think?"

Neo was very cross when he came to the end of his song and not only was Gandalf cringing and covering his ears, but he looked quite unimpressed.

"Well, Neo, my boy, I hope you do not decide to unleash that plague upon the people of your world. Shall we go back to camp?"

"You know, just because I'm not interested in sexually doesn't mean you can't appreciate my singing."

Gandalf blinked as Neo walked away.... He was starting to feel horribly old and horribly annoyed. Oh well, Neo couldn't help being...well, an idiot. At least as long as Neo was safe, the ring was safe. Neo had no idea what the ring was capable of.

Still, maybe the boy was just inexperienced. After all, he had been put through a lot. Gandalf sighed. The sooner, they got past the mountains the boy would be better. 

***

tbc


	8. The Elf in Winter

Author's Notes: Stupid Neo's singing. Anyway, here's some more of the Fellowship as they struggle with Caradhras. :]

***

It took a few days, but at last they arrived at the base of Caradhras. Switch didn't look too thrilled about the idea, but she had refused to say anything about what the books said to the others which particularly annoyed Neo and Cypher. Trinity didn't really want to know. She was hoping when this was all over, she could go home and read them for herself.  Which made her feel a bit dorky, but oh well.

Setting up the mountain was a difficult task. Gandalf led the way with everyone following him. Trinity noticed with amusement that they were lined up according to height...well, except for Neo and Cypher who were at the back, so maybe they were lined up according to IQ. 

Trinity sighed as Neo fell over, his necklace slipping off and practically falling off the cliff. There was a odd moment when Cypher picked it up and didn't seem like he planned to give it back to Neo at all.

He held it muttering about how useful it was before Switch threatened to smack him upside the head if he didn't give it to Neo.

Trinity glared at him as they started up the mountain.

***

As they continued their slow ascent, Legolas began to perch on top of the snow banks as they struggled through them. He seemed the most cheerful of the group, whistling to himself and smiling.

"Show off," Cypher muttered unhappily.

"Maybe he's like a Christmas Elf," Neo suggested.

"A Christmas Elf?" 

"Yeah, Christmas...ummm...basically this fat guy has all these elves that make toys for little children and--"

"Not to interrupt this highly informative lecture, but what exactly does that have to do with Legolas being able to walk on top of the snow?" Gimli asked.

"...Umm..."

"I see."

"You know, why is it that Middle Earth is so racist. Humans can't do anything. I mean, the freakin' Elf can dance on the snow and see things from a hundred miles away, he gets to live in all the nice places....it's really unfair."

"Oh yes, Cypher, it's extremely unfair for fictional races to be better than white human males."

"Come on, Switch, it is unfair!"

"Your foolish race will reign supreme in the end, so you shouldn't complain," Legolas added sadly. 

Switch glared at Cypher. "Yeah, you big dumb jerk!"

"Hey!"

"He's right. Even on Middle Earth there's no escaping stupid Men."

Legolas nodded empathetically.

"But Legolas is basically just some white guy with pointy ears."

"But it is because of those pointy ears, his keen vision, his lean body, his manners and superior personal hygiene that Legolas is not just a white Man but an Elf."

Legolas grinned before slipping on an ice patch and almost falling off the mountainside before Switch grabbed him.

"What about his superior lack of balance?" Gimli asked with a smirk.

"Hey!"

"What he lacks in balance, he makes up for in charm."

Legolas smiled smugly as he went back to walking on the snow banks.

***

Trinity was surprised that there was less annoying Neo moments as they made their way up Caradhras but she was beginning to assume from the blue pallor of his lips that mostly it was because he was freezing to death. 

"Hey, Neo."

"So…cold…can't…feel…legs."

The hobbits weren't doing too well either. The Dwarf hadn't said anything but that was probably because his lips were frozen solid. Gandalf seemed grim as they beat off the snow and tried to force their way up. 

Cypher seemed to be doing better than most though Switch had to stop him from trying to throw Legolas off the mountain. The Elf really needed to start pretending that the snow bothered him.

"We can't go on like this," Trinity pointed out, patting Neo's shoulder and trying to thaw out the hobbits.

"We have to," Switch said with a grim sort of determination, but even Gandalf was beginning to realize that battle is hopeless.

"What's causing all this freaking snow? Maybe it's the magician Pokemon."

"Sarumon, Cypher. His name is Sarumon."

"Who cares what the hell his name is?"

"It is not Sarumon, who is a wizard not a magician," Gandalf said sternly. "And that is far more important than remembering his name. All the same, Cypher is wise to point out that the situation is most unique. It would seem that Caradhras himself is refusing us passage."

"The what is doing what?"

"Oh shut up, Cypher!" Switch said, and everyone was surprised by how angry she sounded. "Shut up, already! We have to find another way to go, is what this means!"

"There's other ways? Then what the hell are we--"

"All right, you two, stop," Trinity said in exasperation. "We'll yell, fight, whatever at the base of the mountain okay? Right now, let's just go. Cypher, you take the Dwarf. Switch, you take the hobbits and I'll try to get Neo."

Gandalf nodded to her gratefully as he began to clear a path for them to use.

Trinity frowned though. Both Gandalf and Switch knew something though neither one seemed particularly willing to share what was wrong. Maybe it could wait, or at least she hoped it could. 

She went to go dig Neo out of the snow.

***

tbc


	9. C is for cookie that's good enough for N...

***

Arguments did indeed ensue once the Fellowship got off of Caradhras. Trinity sighed as she watched the hobbits and Neo thaw by the fire. They were rather quiet and sullen. Maybe Neo was starting to realize he wasn't at DisneyLand. This quest was going to be hard work.

Gandalf was smoking thoughtfully on his pipe while Switch scowled at nothing in particular. Cypher was doing the same. It had taken a black eye and several choice words on Switch's part but he had finally shut up about the Mines of Moria route.

Gimili was shaking his head at the very notion. From what Trinity had heard she was inclined to agree with him. Legolas was still enjoying the snow and keeping a look-out. 

Trinity had had just about enough of the sulking, which is why she was currently building a snow man. Hell, this was better than dealing with the Matrix. No agents, no gun fights, just snow and grumpy Middle Earthians.

Legolas came over after awhile and stared at her creation. She had to admit it wasn't the best snowman, but he seemed more amused than critical. "Why did you make this man out of snow?"

"It's...a mortal custom back home."

Legolas looked up suspiciously. "Does this involve C'hristmas?"

"Well, sort of..."

"It's a nice tradition despite that it centers around the barbaric notion of my people being slaves to some fat man."

Trinity chuckled. "That's just a myth."

"....oh..."

Trinity smirked. The Elf was so cute. "Have you ever made a snow angel?"

***

Neo was glad that they were done with the evil mountain whose name started with C. He could think of better things that started with C. He wished he had some of those better things that started with C and a glass of warm milk.

He was glad the muppets seemed to be doing all right. 

He didn't quite understand why everyone was looking so unhappy besides Trinity who was clearly losing her grip. Making snow angels with the Elf was definitely a waste of time. Was she hitting on the Elf?

"Why don't we let the ring bearer decide?"

Neo fumed silently staring off at the Elf and his girlfriend...well, his almost-girlfriend.

Neo felt something very cold and wet hit his cheek. A snowball.

"Yo, ringbearer."

Neo turned around quickly and chucked a snowball at Cypher who quickly ducked it. Drat. he started making another.

"Neo!"

He stopped immediately. Gandalf sounded mad.

"Thank you. Look, Neo, we need to decide what to do. Either we attempt Caradhras again or we go through the Mines of Moria."

Middle Earth, the Matrix, whatever certainly had nifty names for everything. The C one was the evil mountain thing, right? The M and M one sounded more promising. Gosh, he really missed M and Ms.

"The Mines of Moria."

Only the hobbits and Cypher seemed happy with the decision, the rest glared at him.

"What?"

***

"I still don't think this is really necessary, Smith. We shouldn't bring guns to the peaceful Shire. We might hurt one of the hobbits."

Smith rubed his temples. Maybe the other two agents really would never come back from their trip. Oh, that was indeed a happy thought.

"Brown, we've been over this. To hell with the stupid hobbits! This mission is much more important than...." Smith frowned. "Jones...what is that under your jacket?"

"What jacket?"

"The one you're wearing?"

"Oh...this jacket? What makes you think there's something under it? He he he."

"...Jones!"

The other two agents jumped and Jones reached into his jacket and pulled out a battered copy of The Lord of the Rings.   

"And what pray tell is that doing under your jacket?"

"....I was hoping to get autographs from Mr. Gandalf and the hobbits."

"You were what?!"

"I was hop--"

Give me that book immediately!"

"No!"

"Now, Jones! I'm serious! Give me the book!"

"I don't want to."

"I didn't ask if you wanted to."

"But..."

Smith snatched the book away from him.

"Smith!"

Smith rolled his eyes. "You're both leaving now. And if you don't hurry up and find Mr. Anderson, I'm going to personally rip this book to shreds!"

"You'd rip up Jones' book? You heartless bastard!"

"What was that, Brown? Smith said grinning viciously while opening up the book and eyeing the appendixes.

"You wouldn't!"

"Want to bet?"

 "No stop! We'll go! Just don't hurt the book! The book makes no sense without the timelines!"

Smith grinned as the agents quickly ate some of the green jellybeans and got ready to go to Middle Earth. This would be easier than he thought.

***

Jones looked particularly miserable as they were strapped down and waited for the jellybean to take effect. He'd never forgive Smith if any harm came to his beloved book. Then blink, they were already there.

They weren't at the Shire at all but….Jones and Smith could only stare as they watched frightened Elves race by them.

"Rivendell!" They both exclaimed at once, jumping up and down like fangirls for a split second. Then they realized what they were doing, ahem-ed and began brushing off their suits. 

There was a brief silence and then they went back to celebrating.

"And Smith isn't here to ruin it!" 

"I vote we just stay here!"

Jones looked around. "But if we're in Rivendell, who do you think go sent back to deal with Smith?"

"Two very poor unfortunate souls."

"Well, so long as it isn't you and me, I guess it doesn't matter--"

"Ahhhhh! Nooooooooo!"

Jones looked in the direction that a panic-stricken Brown was pointing at.

There was Smith. Wearing a robe of some sort and he had pointy ears. Did he really think such a pathetic disguise would fool two people who had been putting up with him since Day One of their virtual existence?

"Smith! What are you doing here?"

"And why are you in such a ridiculous outfit?"

"…." Elrond sighed. It was going to be another one of those days.

***

tbc


	10. Every Universe ought to have a Hugo

Author's Note: And now for something different…not completely different, but different nonetheless. I give you a whole chapter of the Agents and Elrond. Enjoy. :]

***

Smith sighed as the two headless weird men roamed around his office, bumping into things and cutting them to ribbons with their swords. It was almost enough to make him miss Jones and Brown. Almost.

He wondered what had become of them and smirked. Hopefully something horrible. That or they were succeeding with apprehending one Thomas 'Neo' Anderson. This man had caused them enough trouble already. 

He hid the jellybeans in a locked drawer in his metal desk which his two new idiot henchman couldn't slice through with their swords before picking up Jones' battered copy of The Lord of the Rings. He hated to admit it, but the book could actually have its uses. Particularly when if came to discovering what these two numbskulls were. 

***

"For the last time, I'm not A'gent S'mith!" Elrond said rubbing his temples. He wondered why humans were so ignorant. They should be the ones having to leave not Elves. It was really getting on his very last nerve.

"Oh and who are you supposed to be then?"

"...Elrond the Half-Elven."

".....Oh...."

"I said that before too."

"I guess we weren't listening."

Elrond scowled. "You pulled my ears, wasn't that proof enough?"

"We're computer programs, Mr. Elrond, so that doesn't entirely prove anything."

"You idiot! He doesn't know what a computer program is! Besides, Smith didn't eat any jellybeans..."

Elrond wondered if this Smith was some sort of enlightened leader in the M'atrix. He must be to stir up such awe in those that followed him...or fled from him...or continually tried to maim him with shiny black metal things called guns. "Well, good sirs, now that that little matter is cleared up, I trust you'll be on your way?"

"Well, actually...we sort of need to locate a man named Thomas Anderson."

"....He doesn't happen to look like someone else does he?"

"No....Oh, that's right," the other A'gent said. "He goes by the name of Neo."

"Ah, the ring bearer."

"The ring bearer?"

"They made him the ring bearer....good God, Jones!"

"I know, Brown."

Elrond looked at them quizzically.

"Well, I'm afraid he can't be your ring bearer for much longer. He needs to come with us."

"That is impossible unless the true ring bearer returns."

The A'gents looked at one another. "Huh....well...could you tell us where he is?"

"It seems to me that you intend to do him harm and Middle Earth needs him to accomplish this task. Can you not simply wait until he is finished?"

"Well, we'd like to, but you don't know what Smith is like."

"There's no telling what he'd do if we failed."

"I wish there was more I could do for..." He stopped as they pointed shiny metal black things called guns in his general direction. "What pray tell are you doing?"

"I'm afraid you leave us no choice but to force you to cooperate."

Maybe he should have pretended to be A'gent S'mith after all....

***

Ah, here it was....Nuzgul, ring wraiths, etc. etc. Why did everything have to have so many names? What was so important about names to humans anyway? Smith found it all rather tediously tiresome. 

At least the Nuzguls had stopped slicing things up like little human children throwing tantrums. He really wasn't sure what to do with them. Evidently, you needed some ring to make them work properly.

Basically all of this could be blamed on one convieniently dead man named J.R.R. Tolkien. He frowned and skipped over a poorly-written battle scene. Maybe he should have let Jones take this book anyway. He doubted his two associates knew what they were doing. 

Oh well. Nothing in here at all about how to communicate with Nuzguls. How disappointing. He sighed and closed the book before running a search on Nuzguls until he found the program he was looking for.

***

tbc


End file.
